How to Choose a Mainline Life Coach
Everyone would love to pave the way for resilience, but some need a little help. Here’s how to choose a life coach around the main line.
Last year was Wendy Williams’ winter of discontent. “I felt burned out at work, I was in a relationship that I didn’t feel good about and didn’t understand why, and I was dissatisfied with my life in general,” says Williams, a culinary consultant for a chain of high-end supermarkets.
Williams tried a range of therapies over the years before coming across an article about a local life coach. “Deep down, I knew I wanted to do more,” she says.
Williams contacted life coach Tanya Tecce, who is based in Delaware County. “My role is to help people discover what they want to experience, rather than focusing on all the negative emotions they’re feeling,” says Tecce, who has degrees in psychology and sociology and is certified in transformational neurolinguistic programming.
“For Tanya Tecce, it’s all about clarity. “It helps people connect to their personal GPS to build a roadmap to help them get where they want to be by identifying and focusing on what you want out of life,” she says. “When you have clarity, you are less easily frightened, shaken, misled, or discouraged.”
Tecce’s goal is to reprint the nervous system so customers can learn to behave differently without having to think about it. “Transformational psychology focuses less on why you’re going through a certain situation and more on what you want instead, and how you can move forward to achieve your goals,” says Tecce.
Williams worried about what others thought and felt invisible or undervalued at work. She was also in a toxic relationship, although she didn’t realize it at the time. “With Tanya’s help, I realized that much of my dissatisfaction was deeply rooted, and the coaching brought those issues to light,” she says.
Then, they proposed action steps to solve these problems. Williams has learned to speak for herself and is no longer paralyzed by fear of confrontation. “I am able to be myself,” she says. “I don’t worry about other people’s judgments, which helps reduce a lot of anxiety and allows me to focus on turning my dreams into reality.”
Life coaching helped Kate Smith take control of her job as an occupational therapist. She now works on her own terms as an independent contractor with more flexible hours. “I’m a people-pleasing convalescent,” Smith says. “Before, I had a hard time saying no to people.”
Coaching helped Smith overcome his perfectionism, improve his communication skills and better equip him to deal with conflict. “I feel more confident because I know I can handle whatever might happen,” she says. “My responses to various situations have become more automatic. I don’t dwell on things before making decisions.
Life coaching also gives clients the tools to facilitate change. “It emphasizes helping people identify what they want, rather than the traditional medical model which focuses on treating a problem or symptom,” says Shobhana Kanal, an assistant. social clinician based in Haverford who has worked with Tecce. “Good coaching, like good therapy, can help you become more flexible in how you think and react to things in your daily life. It helps you engage in less self-criticism and regret, and you have more mental and emotional energy for current experiences and goals.
For Tecce, it’s all about clarity. “It helps people connect to their personal GPS to build a roadmap to help them get where they want to be by identifying and focusing on what they want in life,” she says. “When you have clarity, you are less easily frightened, shaken, misled, or discouraged.”
Ultimately, such clarity leads to resilience. We are less critical of ourselves and we learn to take matters into our own hands, knowing that we are not doing anything wrong. “Your focus shifts to what you want to achieve, what you most desire, and what you need to do to get there,” Tecce explains. “That’s when the change starts to happen.”
NOTE: Customer names have been changed to protect their privacy.